In this topsy turvy place we call the world, sometimes down is up, east is west, and black is white. Even more dizzying, sometimes lawyers (280.5) score better than humans (275.19) and males (275.23) beat females (270.23). And forget about dogs and cats living together, as the canines (225.0) are skulking away with their tails between their legs, while the felines (no entries) have apparently boycotted the contest altogether.
The Millan-os proved to be one tough cookie when it came to picking pools this season, as the six entry group (perhaps also known as the "7th Floor Crew") shaked and baked its way to this season's top Tag Team mark, averaging 298.8 points. Coming in a distant second to the gourmet baked goods was the group formerly known as Whiteside and his Enemies, now dubbed "Whiteside and Haters" by the two youngest Whiteside entrants, with an average of 281.2. Last year's top Tag Team, the Donadio Group, finished third (274.75), barely edging the D'Zuro Consortium (274.0). Among the also-rans, DBR (272.5) once again squeaked ahead of the Ripley Believe-it-or-Nots (269.33). The Urban Engineers (257.5) failed to make a tribute to Alberts, but at least they beat the Remnants of 12A (257.33) by the slimmest of margins. And continuing what seems to be an annual tradition, the Leach Gang finished at the bottom, with an average of 250.56 points.
Among favorite schools (minimum 2 entries to qualify), University of Pennsylvania supporters (327.5) proved that an Ivy education is at least good for something. Due to the Orange probation, Syracuse fans (292.0) had extra time to fill out their entries, and it showed. Among schools that actually made the NCAA tournament, Duke fans (277.1) demonstrated their team is better than they are, beating out Maryland (265.0) and VCU (239.5), but finishing behind Villanova (287.6) and Temple (282.33). Among the remaining qualifying schools, Penn State (270.4) edged Johns Hopkins (268.0), and for DCCC (204.0), well the joke sort of writes itself, doesn't it?
In the tri-state area, Pennsylvania (278.7) showed New Jersey (274.75) and New York (271.4) which real estate is choicest. Residents of warm weather states illustrated the effect of sunshine on the brain, as Florida (262.5), California (259.33), and Virginia (257.75) got tanned at the bottom. Going into more detail on a regional basis, Western PA (315.5) bettered urban Philadelpia (284.0), suburban Philadelphia (276.18), central New Jersey (274.75), and New York City (271.4). The Midwest (301.0) beat out the South (261.2) and the West (259.33). And the region known as DMV (257.5) probably needs a new identity.
Teachers (307.0) showed students (272.33) that they still have a lot to learn. Those in the financial industries (296.43) suggested to those in the IT industry (287.75) that it's more lucrative the cook the books than hack into computer networks. Retired people (279.78) perhaps pointed practicing attorneys (273.0) and engineers (272.25) toward what they should be doing next.
The average commissioner (296.0) topped the average contest entrant (274.82). And our underage-entrants once again exemplified one of the commissioners' favorite old adages, proving that children (265.57) should be seen but not seen gambling.
Top names this year include Jack (302.5), Kevin (292.5), and Matt (282.0). Calling yourself Luke (279.5), Nick (279.3), Jeff (277.0), Mike (275.0), or David (272.6) seems neither to help nor hurt. Then again, anyone named George (269.5), John (267.0), Bob (267.0), and Rick (264.0) might want to consider witness protection.
Tomorrow: Rivals 2015. So stay tuned.
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